Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Mid-life crisis!

You start with an honest eagerness to learn and contribute. When you are just halfway through it, suddenly the world seems so flat, so boring, all the talks starts to fade away, you start to loose your grip on reality. You look at the time and find that you are just only half-way through. You feel sometimes frustrated on your failure to cope up like the rest out there. You doubt your competency. You just get blank, empty. You don't understand a single thing. It seems a long time but when you again look at the watch only few seconds have passed. You try to think about good times, but your thoughts become confused. You feel like dropping out of this boredom, doing something interesting than this, but at the same time you feel guilt. Then at a time the strong urge to do something interesting overcomes your guilt. You discard the reality and delve into your own world. You don't care for the others anymore and let your dreams come true. But as time passes by and nears the end, you suddenly snap out of your state and realize time is up and you can not go back! You have wasted the entire middle third of your and probably others' time. You repent, at least sometimes.

But the class is already over and you have slept through it like always. You wonder why, at all, you have taken this course. I know you don't want to sleep through it, but can't help dozing off as the class nears the halfway just like some can't help their self doubt as they enter mid-life crisis!

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